Lucas Delgado
If you're 19 and looking to meet girls, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it's important to understand the type of girl you're interested in dating. For example, if you're not into party girls, bars and clubs might not be the best places to look. Instead, try to optimise your lifestyle by living in neighbourhoods and frequenting venues where you're likely to meet women with similar interests. For instance, if you're a health nut, try striking up conversations at a health food store or gym. If you're a bookworm, head to a popular coffee shop or bookstore. Online dating apps like Tinder are also an option, but be mindful of your bio and the topics you discuss.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Dating apps | Tinder, Happn |
| Social media | Instagram, LinkedIn |
| Venues | Bars, clubs, grocery stores, coffee shops |
| Competition | Less competition in venues where there are fewer men |
| Hobbies | Reading, playing musical instruments |
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What You'll Learn
Parks and beaches
When it comes to picking up chicks at parks and beaches, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it's important to understand the qualities of your ideal girl, as this can help you determine the best places to meet her. For example, if you're into athletic and flexible girls, parks and beaches could be great options.
At parks, women are generally not expecting to be approached by guys, unlike at bars or nightclubs. So, when starting a conversation, it's crucial to put her at ease and make her feel comfortable opening up to you. Approach her with a relaxed, confident, and easy-going attitude. Smile, relax, and initiate a conversation by complimenting her or simply saying hello. For instance, you could say, "Hey, how's it going? I know it's not normal for random people to stop and say hello, but I thought I'd say a quick hello because you're cute." If she's sitting, take a seat next to her to make the conversation more casual and comfortable.
Having a dog can be a great icebreaker at parks. Women often love dogs, and it gives you a common topic to start a conversation. You could approach a woman with a dog and say, "Oh my God! I love your dog!" and then start petting the dog. After a while, transition the conversation to the woman herself by stating your intentions. For example, you could say, "Listen, I'll be honest. Your dog is super cute, but the reason I came over here was because I like the look of you."
Be mindful of your body language and approach. Avoid coming across as a stalker or sneaking up on her, as it might startle her. Instead, embrace the joy of being outdoors and having a pleasant day. Make sure you have a purpose beyond just 'picking up women'. For example, go for a walk, grab a coffee, or get a sandwich, and let the interaction unfold naturally.
Be respectful and romantic in your approach. Most people meet their partners through proximity attraction, but you can offer a woman a unique and romantic experience. You could ask for directions or help, and then transition to a compliment or a more direct approach, such as, "I saw you from over there, and I just had to come over and say hello."
Beaches are also great places to meet women, as there is often little competition from other guys. Popular beaches are filled with beautiful women, and approaching them with confidence and a friendly attitude can make a positive impression. Remember to avoid coming on too strong and respect their boundaries.
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University campuses
A good tip is to find common ground, which could be as simple as asking if she has dropped something, like a book, and then taking it from there. You could also try a more direct approach, such as saying, "Excuse me, I think you're beautiful. I'm [name]." This is a straightforward and mature way to introduce yourself. It is also a good idea to ask about her program or major, and you might find some common interests that way.
Dining halls are another great place to meet people. You can ask to join someone who is sitting alone, and this could be the start of a beautiful friendship or relationship. You could also attend open mic nights, concerts, or trivia nights, which are often listed on college calendars, and these events are perfect for meeting new people.
Finally, don't be afraid to ask friends to introduce you to people they know. Girls tend to have larger circles of female friends, so it might be a good idea to ask your female friends if they can make an introduction.
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Cafes
When approaching a woman in a cafe, it's crucial to match your energy level with the environment. If you're too intense, you'll likely turn her off. Instead, go with the flow and let the environment and the woman dictate the vibe. Be mindful that she might not be in a talkative mood, so take it easy and add a good, positive vibe to the interaction.
When starting a conversation, a playful mindset can help ease the pressure. Tease her about what she's doing—reading, writing, or something else. For example, you could say, "That looks hard." You don't need an earth-shattering pickup line; just be friendly and get the conversation going. Ask open-ended questions that allow her to talk more and create a back-and-forth dialogue. For instance, instead of asking, "What are you reading?" say, "What do you like about the book you're reading?"
As the conversation continues, build a deeper rapport by asking questions like, "What do you do for fun?" or "What would you do with $10 million?" This gives you insight into what matters in her life while keeping the conversation light and fun. Remember to also open up about yourself, creating an emotional connection.
When the conversation reaches a high point, invite her out and ask for her number. Always have some fun date ideas ready to suggest. Don't worry if things don't work out with one woman; cafes are great places to practice your skills, and you'll likely see other women there again.
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Bars and clubs
If you're looking to meet women in bars and clubs, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, understand the qualities of your ideal partner. For example, if you're a health nut, maybe she should be too, so consider going to health food stores or gyms. If you're looking for someone who likes to party, then bars and clubs are a good option.
Bars can be a great place to meet women, and there are different types to consider. Neighbourhood bars, like your local pub, are great to visit with friends but may not be the best spot to pick someone up. Popular bars, like franchise pubs, can be crowded and it may be harder to get someone's attention. Dive bars, on the other hand, are more casual, with cheaper drinks and less image-conscious patrons, so you may find it easier to meet single women there.
When you're in a bar, be friendly, nice, and caring. Offer to play a game like pool or darts, or suggest a drinking game. This can help break the ice and make it easier to start a conversation. You could also ask about her dog, if she has one, or even just ask about her drink choice.
Clubs are also an option if you're looking for a fast-paced, competitive environment. Keep in mind that you may find some crazy girls in clubs, and they may not be "girlfriend material". However, if you're looking for a quick pickup, then this could be the place.
If you're in Los Angeles, there are a few notable singles bars to try, including one in Culver City, which is a barbershop by day and a speakeasy by night, and another in Highland Park, which has a laid-back, '70s-inspired vibe.
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Online
If you're 19 and looking to meet girls online, there are a few ways to go about it. Firstly, you could try dating apps. Tinder, for example, is an option for 18 and 19-year-olds, and it's serious about banning underage users. However, it's worth noting that Tinder is mostly populated by singles in their early 20s, so you might find it harder to connect with people at a similar stage of life. Another option in this age bracket is Coffee Meets Bagel, which is geared towards those seeking serious relationships rather than casual hookups.
Outside of dating apps, you can use social media to your advantage. Try to optimise your lifestyle and the content you post online to appeal to your target demographic. For example, if you're into health and fitness, make that known, and you might find like-minded people. You can also join online communities or forums where people with similar interests hang out. This could be a Facebook group, a subreddit, or a specific online forum.
Another option is to use a more targeted approach. Think about the type of person you want to meet and where they might be found online. For example, if you're looking for someone who likes books, try striking up conversations with people in book-related Facebook groups or Goodreads forums. If you're into gaming, try chatting with people on Discord servers or Twitch streams.
Lastly, don't be afraid to put yourself out there. Online dating can be a numbers game, so increase your chances by reaching out to people and starting conversations. Be mindful of boundaries and consent, but don't be too hard on yourself if things don't work out with someone. There are plenty of other potential connections out there.
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Frequently asked questions
It's important to view dating in the same way you would sell a book. If you wanted to sell a book, a bookstore would be the hardest place to sell it as you'd be competing with all the other books. The same goes for dating. If you go to bars, clubs, or online, you are competing with every other guy there. Instead, go to places with little to no competition, such as a local university campus or a popular park.
Strike up conversations with people. If you're at a university campus, visit a cafe and talk to people. If you're at a park, approach someone and start a conversation.
If you're at a bar, smile, introduce yourself, and buy the person a drink. If you're at a club, talk to someone who's dancing. If you're not a good dancer, that's okay! Just talk to someone at the bar.
Understand the qualities of your ideal partner. This will help you figure out where they hang out. Also, work on your conversation skills. You can do this by writing down witty lines, talking to yourself in the mirror, or taking improv classes.
